Okay so you're suggesting on having a good game plan will ultimately help us to kind of being more spontaneous if we want to be, right? >> Yeah I think that's what I meant. Think of it like in more detail. When you go through your game plan you become more aware of your own needs, of your own circumstances, your own characteristics which will include your personality, your history and your vulnerabilities, you become more self aware. And then we also talk about capacity. And capacity is very important. Like using the same, analogy again, if you like more confident in yourself if you have other skills when you go skiing or playing hockey, you're going to be able to enjoy it more because you can take on more challenges, you're more prepared to deal with uncertainties or sudden happenings. The capacity actually allows you to be more spontaneous. As you can see if you go through a game plan, if it's actually a self reflection process and when you've done that it will have two advantages. One is that you will become better able to communicate your situation to your partner, so that like he or she can understand why you're sometimes neurotic and insecure. That makes it more manageable for the partner. The other advantage is of course you can have a better understanding when your partner is sharing similar challenges or difficulties with you. The two partners will go into relationship with sort of like a more open mind and capacity for engaging with each others vulnerabilities and specific needs, which I think is very helpful for the development of a relationship, the interaction, the communication can actually be enhanced. And if we put all this together, my sense is that, like, the person having been through [INAUDIBLE] the process of planning and thinking through, we'll be way better equipped to move into a relationship and flow with it, take on challenging situations and be himself or herself more authentic. >> Hm. >> Spontaneous.